Crucial Conversations
I didn't want to read
Crucial Conversations, written by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzer. It seemed that if a
book took four people to write it that it was going to be boring.
Instead, I found myself thoroughly enjoying it, and learning a thing or two along the way. Basically, this book takes a deep
down look at how people tend to have, or not have, conversations with others, and why we need to open up these conversations and
break down the barriers so that both parties can have the opportunity to get what they want while being honest with each other.
It begins by talking about the kinds of crucial conversations we tend to avoid, such as asking a friend to repay a loan, dealing
with rebellious teens, and ending relationships, and why these things need to be addressed, along with how. Then, throughout
eleven thought provoking chapters with subtitles such as "the power of dialogue", "how to make it safe to talk about almost
anything", and "how to listen when others blow up or clam up" (way more interesting titles than the chapter titles themselves),
you read stories, scenarios, then solutions on how to break down barriers and actually get to the root of issues by listening
intently and communicating more directly without being mean. Common courtesy thoughts flow throughout this book, as it alternates
in its own way between "it's about you" and "it's not all about you."
By the time you get to the last chapter, you've seen yourself and others in their words, and you're hopefully ready to embrace some
of the lessons and turn them into a new life pattern of communications. I have to admit that, after reading this book, I used
some of what I'd read on a couple of people, and believe it helped establish a relationship with those people that I didn't have
with them previously, and I had already considered myself a pretty good communicator. But, as the quote at the top of the last
chapter says, from Winston Churchill, "To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often."
Crucial Conversations is a must for anyone who ever interacts with others, which means this book is a must for everyone.
It would be interesting to talk to these people one day to learn how the four of them were able to communicate well enough to write
this book.
